IF YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND LIFE…JUST ASK THE KIDS!!

A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, “There were 2 boy kittens and 2 girl kittens!” “How did you know?” his mother asked. “Daddy picked them up and looked underneath,” he replied. “I think it’s printed on the bottom.”

*****

On the first day of school, about midmorning, the kindergarten teacher said, “If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers.” A little voice from the back of the room asked, “How will that help?”

*****

A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say grace?” “I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied.
“Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said, “God, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”

*****

After the church service a little boy told the pastor, “When I grow up, I’m going to give you some money.” “Well, thank you,” the pastor replied, “but why?” “Because my daddy says you’re one of the poorest preachers we’ve ever had!”

*****

When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, “Mommy, you are getting fat!” I replied, “Yes honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy.” “I know,” she replied, “but what is growing in your butt?”